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  • Writer's pictureBarbara Palmer

Says Who?


Says who? Statements of ‘fact’ always lead me to offer a different perspective, particularly with working parents who are overwhelmed living by ‘the rules’.  There is a pre-conceived notion that there is a right and wrong way, however I would argue that those are someone else’s judgement of right and wrong.  What is right for one person or family is not necessarily right for another.


Prioritize what is most important to you.

If the priority is time with your child, then maybe showering after childcare drop off would maximize your quality time in the morning.  Consider if the choice is based on habit, cultural messages, or fear of judgement.  And balance those concerns against your mission:  to increase the moments together with your child.  In that equation, baby wins.


Prioritize the schedule that works best for you.

With the recent time change, everyone’s sleep patterns seem to be off.  Witching hours at the end of the day may be best served by bathtime NOT as part of the nighttime ritual, but as a transition moment from school to home.  No matter how old your kids are, wash off the germs of the day (schoolyard, playground, daycare) before transitioning to homework, playtime, dinner and bed. This change in routine may serve you better than a bedtime shower when everyone is tired and can infuse quality time to connect ahead of an evening habit.


Prioritize what works best for your children.

We didn’t send a holiday card this year!  YET.  There are still lots of holidays in 2024.  What about a 2024 ½  family card to check in mid-year.  An Easter or July 4th card.

None of the winter holiday stress.  Different clothing and setting options.  And…there is a good chance that your family photo will not get lost in a pile of others (you may even stay on the fridge until the next winter card season).  Who says winter cards are the only time to share family photos and updates?


What works for you, works for you.

As you look to prioritize what matters most and do the work worth doing, question the norms and make your own traditions.  And when you think something is set in stone, ask ‘Says Who?’.



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