Give Guidance

Give Guidance.  Why do we shy away from guiding others on what we need, want or are expecting?  Instead, we expect others to read our mind and then are disappointed when the outcome doesn’t align to our expectations.

A few recent examples from coaching sessions:

Performance Reviews.  Whatever system your company uses for performance management, instead of waiting for your manager to share what they observed in your performance, Give Guidance.  Take the time to review your achievements and provide the areas you would like your manager to review.  

Even if a self-assessment is part of the process, consider providing a short list / evaluation directly to your manager providing insights on why you chose to highlight certain accomplishments and opportunities over others.  It could be that you want to support a narrative for advancement, promotion, or a shift in focus.  Highlighting certain skills over others aligns with your goal of what comes next, and that is an area where you can guide your manager to your desired outcome.

Starting with a New Manager.  Don’t leave this important relationship to chance.  Whether you are new to the company (or your manager is) or there is an internal reporting shift, it is important to Give Guidance to your leader so they know how best to support you.  

First, not all leaders are good managers (luckily, since that is why I am in business).  One of your roles as an employee is to help your manager lead you better.  Try creating an Employee User Manual.  Some organizations employ these guides systemically, but there is no reason you can’t create one for yourself to share with your manager.  

The manual guides your leadership and co-workers to know how you work your best and how they can best work with you.  Like the manual that comes with an appliance, yes you can plug in the washing machine or air fryer and it will work, but the manual gives tips and insights to get the most out of the product.  How can your manager get the most out of you?  How do you like to receive feedback or instructions?  What are your best means of communication?  What are your aspirations or what is your ‘why’?

It is also in your best interest to meet with a new manager to share what you are excited about, where you have had roadblocks in the past, and what your ask is of them in supporting you to do your best work.  Your ongoing dialogues through 1:1 meetings and ad hoc conversations are opportunities for you to lead the discussion.  Come with an agenda and Give Guidance on how your manager can best manage you now, with an eye toward continued and future success.  Your leader’s time is valuable, utilize that time in the most productive and efficient ways.

Co-CEOs of the Household.  Whether you are roommates, married or co-parenting, running a household together taps into aligned expectations and is rooted in habits formed leading up to this moment.  If your family had certain ways of doing things, that does not mean that your partner was raised in the same way.  If you delegate a task to your partner, but don’t provide the ‘why’, then they may not do it the way you expected which leads to both of you being frustrated.  Give Guidance.  

School registration is open for the next month. Share why you think we should register in the first week:  it may fill up, it causes you anxiety, you don’t want to keep following up.  Asking for a ‘home team’ meeting. Share what you hope the meeting will cover:  projects, budgeting, alignment on chores and what ‘complete’ looks like.  Again, you were raised in different households, so don’t assume you do things the same way or are aligned on standards, processes or outcomes.

In the end, giving guidance is as much about you as the person you are sharing with.  You want that promotion, so let your manager know what in your performance should be highlighted so they can be a better advocate.  You want to have a good working relationship with your manager, so help them be your best supporter and sponsor.  You want to know that you and your home team are on the same page which leads to peaceful co-habitation and making your house a home.Looking for support? 

Let me Give Guidance.