Out of Gas.

Out of Gas.  I drove from Seattle to Denver this week.  On the morning of the third day of driving, Google Maps took me off the freeway and onto a country road.  I was in Wyoming, between nothing and nowhere.  My friend that tracks my travels noticed and gave me a call.  I reported that I had been rerouted and we laughed that it was part of the adventure.  Other drivers were doing the same, so I felt okay about it.  Until I didn’t.

The detour quickly became a dirt road, unpaved and heavily potholed.  It felt like I was in the middle of a game of whack a mole, weaving in and out, trying to avoid or at least mitigate the wear and tear of deep pockets in the dirt road.  And then I noticed the gas tank.  What had been close to 40 miles to empty was quickly depleting:  18, 13, 4… and there was no gas station in sight.  Add to the building stress, I hadn’t had a cell signal since shortly after I departed the main road.  

Not only did I start to regret my decision to follow the route guidance, my head was running through possible scenarios should the car completely stop for lack of fuel.  Where could I pull over?  Should I flag someone down or walk to a house (there were none in sight)?  What would I ask them for:  a ride to a gas station or to bring gas to me or send AAA when they got to the next town?  What would safety look like for me and my dog?  And then the gas tank showed no more miles on the tank and an ominous warning that continuing to drive could damage the car battery.

How does running out of gas on a back road in Wyoming relate to work place coaching?

Many of my clients are running on empty.  Their plan of action, goals and priorities are taken off track and rather than question or push back on the re-routing, they take on more work and the whiplash of a change in priorities without question.  They drive around pot holes rather than confront the underlying challenges.  As their stamina wanes, their anxiety rises and their gas tank shows visible signs of depletion, they often wait until it is too late to ask for assistance.

By the time they are out of gas, these employees are white knuckling the steering wheel scanning their brain for a solution.  They often feel isolated, panicked and doubting their choices; evaluating resources and support when they are already depleted.

Signs of burnout present early.  It is a medical condition so I won’t opine here on how to resolve it, but I can share how to try to get out ahead of and avoid burnout using my drive as an analogy.

1. When you are told to re-route your time and energy ask questions, respectfully challenge competing priorities, clarify and align on what is expected of you.  Point out if you are not equipped to be successful and what resources you may need to meet expectations.

   
   

2. Check in frequently along the way ensuring you continue to be aligned and are on the right path.  If not, is it better to adjust or return to where you veered rather than end up depleting resources and not getting to your destination.

   
   

3. Think through contingencies.  Can you delegate other work or any part of what you are being asked to complete?  Is perfection the enemy of good enough and could you burn less fuel with an acceptable if not perfect outcome?

   
   

4. Who is your lifeline?  Can you identify someone to be your wing person who can be a thought partner, sounding board and resource to validate your ability (or inability) to deliver what is being requested of you?  

   
   

5. Know your boundaries.  Confidence, self-awareness, and empowerment all play into your ability to have difficult conversations or deliver what you can with the resources available to you.  It may not meet your usual standards, but it may meet the current need under the current conditions to get to the finish line.

   
   

It is better to identify that you are overwhelmed and running on empty before you get there.  How do you know when you are out of gas?  Detachment from your work, persistent feelings of overwhelm, feeling like nothing you do is good enough, lacking creativity and problem-solving to resolve issues, or feeling like the only solution is to walk away rather than work through your frustration.  

What can you do?  Try to get to the root cause.  Lack of direction or clarity on what is expected of you, lack of tangible goals, resource constraints, unrealistic timelines and expectations, poor leadership, competing priorities all lead to burnout.  Have the difficult conversations with stakeholders about your reality.  Your instinct may be to take time off for a reset, but that only addresses you as an individual and not the underlying demands of the role.  Engaging managers and leadership may help to identify the systemic issues that are leading to your depleting fuel tank.

Back to my drive and the question that was top of mind:  how far could my new hybrid go on empty?  The answer in this instance was at least 20 miles (the distance to the closest gas station).  Every one of those 20 miles tested my resolve, confidence, self-awareness and empowerment.  

How far can you go if you are working with an empty tank?

* My apologies to my parents who are just hearing about this as they read this post.  Some things are better not reported in real time.